The Counselor’s Couch, Part 2: Vera tells ALL

A continuation from Part 1: Real Answers. Real Help.

I knew I always wanted a baby, but with my baby I also wanted a husband and family; my opinion of “normal.” I know being a single mom is possible, especially this day and age, but I didn’t think it was a possibility for me.

I was afraid to be pregnant because I was convinced that I could not make it work financially. My family was far away and Chloe’s father wanted nothing to do with us. Ending the pregnancy would have been easiest; nothing in my life would have to change. But even as these thoughts passed through my head, I think a larger part of me knew that Chloe was meant to be.

I confided in a friend at work. She helped me clarify my thoughts and realize I really wanted to keep Chloe, but I was still scared. Eventually I found PCCV. [Vera was referred to PCCV by a local abortion clinic.] I stopped by one day looking for programs that might assist me financially in keeping Chloe.

What I found was so much more. I found peace of mind. I found a great friend who drove three hours to come to Chloe’s baby shower. I found someone I could call and ask the silliest questions. My notebook is filled with “called Nicole about…”

The physical support - baby gifts, layette and especially the crib - were all very important, but having Nicole there for emotional support made all the difference in the world. Even my parents are so thrilled that I found PCCV and had your support. I felt in control and strong and, more importantly, not alone.

I was never pressured by PCCV. I had already made up my mind, but was afraid of the decision. Nicole just listened to me. She let me talk and by the time we were done there was Chloe. I would say, “She is a dream come true, but…”; PCCV helped remove the “buts” and let me enjoy the rest. I started thinking that I could do it and I did. I made the perfect little room fit for a princess with just their crib and a coat of paint. I even used the bedspread from my childhood room. PCCV was there for me whenever I needed them. It meant so much to me.

If I had to give advice to others in my situation? Get over the fact that you need to ask for help! The hardest thing in my life was to ask for help. Yes, you are great, beautiful, talented and successful, but sometimes even the best of us need help. I know it is hard to ask, believe me. I wasn’t going to. I thought I was too good for it. I mean, I went to college, I have a graduate degree. Why would I need help, right? But I did! My pregnancy, my life and Chloe’s life, wouldn’t be so peaceful if I had not asked for help.

Please read Part 3: The Pregnancy Centers of Central Virginia for the continuation.